On Tuesday, I said I wasn’t going to write down any resolutions this year, only things I was looking forward to.
But as the days passed, and I started to think even more about how I wanted 2013 to be a better year than 2012 was, I remembered the simplest but most important thing: Change begins with me.
This won’t be a better year if I don’t make it so. I need to cause positive change for me and others around me.
So I decided to write down some resolutions after all.
Of course, the usual ones (like eating better, working out more, not being quite so distracted by social media, trying new things, etc.) apply, just as they always have.
This year, the resolutions I have in mind are bigger, more important ones.
Here they are.
1. Be less judgmental.
This first one I’m kind of stealing from DJ Waldow. But that’s because it’s a good idea.
In 2012, I spent way too much time criticizing other people for their typos, spelling mistakes, “bad” ways of using social media, oversharing, and other things I didn’t like. I even wrote a whole blog post about the reasons I would unfriend people on Facebook. And I have another blog post still in draft about the things people do on social media that drive me nuts.
Suffice it to say, I’m not going to publish that second blog post. If I see something I don’t like or that annoys me, rather than be a jerk about it, pass judgement, or get annoyed, I’m just going to ignore it and keep my opinion or criticism (no matter how constructive) to myself. If it happens a few times on social media, I’ll just hide the person’s updates or unfollow them.
I’ll probably even stop following people on Twitter who are always judgmental of others. I’ll admit, I used to enjoy reading the mockery, but now it’s just getting tired.
2. Root for good things.
When bad, undesirable, or frustrating things happen to you, the natural reaction is to wish those same things — or worse — on the people who caused them.
I wasted too much time last year wishing bad things on certain people and celebrating when karma kicked them in the ass. That’s just not healthy. And maybe it’s the reason that more good things didn’t happen to me. After all, negative energy just begets negative results.
So in 2013, I’m going to do what I can to only root for good things, and to help others more often when I can. It’s not for selfish reasons, but maybe if I can put some more good karma into the world, it’ll come back to me too.
3. Focus on myself.
I suppose this one goes hand-in-hand with number one. We all worry too much about others — what they’re up to and what they think of us. We try to keep up with the Joneses when we feel like we’re lacking.
Whether it’s following their job changes or learning about their dating life or whatever, there are always things that other people are doing that cause you — or rather, me to reflect in a negative way on my own situation, and get frustrated.
Enough of that.
In 2013 I’m going to measure my success — professionally and personally — by my own measuring stick: Happiness. If I’m happy, and my life is moving forward, then I’m doing well. If I’m not, then I’m going to do what I have to do to make myself happy. No more comparing my own life to other people’s.
A better me. A better 2013.
These three deceptively simple resolutions will hopefully result in a better, more positive year in 2013.
It all comes down to this: Change starts with me.
What can you change about yourself that will make 2013 a better year? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.
Love this, Martin! Well said (or written), as always. Admirable goals, inspiring post. I know you’ll succeed.
Thanks, Stephani!