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15 Things I Just Don’t Understand

9 May

Can you smell the wood burning?

I’ve had lots of time to myself over the past month or so, which means I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.

Now, I’m pretty confident in the things I know. But some things I just don’t get.

And those things I spend a lot of time debating in my head. (It’s a very productive debate. Believe me.)

So in the spirit of presenting another side of my thought process(es), here’s a list of 15 things I don’t understand. Continue reading

23 Things I’m Definitely Right About

4 Apr

My friend Todd has long threatened to start a blog called “Why Marty Is Wrong,” which he will use to refute everything I write about on my own blog.

One thing I know for sure is that Todd will never do this.

Why?

Because there’s a lot more that I’m right about than I’m wrong about. And that includes the fact that Todd has much better things to do than debate me in a point-counterpoint blog post back-and-forth.

In short, he’s all talk.

So because I have free reign to say what I want, knowing that Todd won’t ever create that blog, here’s a list of 23 things that he can’t dispute. Continue reading

It Really Is a Small, Small World

28 Jul

Anyone who knows me knows I have a soft spot for nostalgia.

Reconnecting with old friends is, for me, one of the most fun aspects of Facebook, for example. And I’ve already told you about how I’m reliving my high school days by re-reading the journals I kept during those four years.

So you can only imagine how much I enjoy reconnecting with people in the most random of places, far from the computer. Continue reading

Rage Against the Machines

16 Apr

We live in a world that gets more automated every day.

You can drive through toll booths without stopping to pay.

You can open car doors without even taking out your key.

You can turn on lights or other electronic devices simply by clapping your hands.

You can say a person’s name and your phone will place the call.

You can turn on a sink, a hand-dryer, or a paper-towel dispenser with just a wave of your hand.

And you can flush a toilet just by standing up or stepping away.

Those are just a few of the many examples, and I’ll bet that by the time you finish reading this post, there’ll be at least one more. Continue reading

Zzzzzzzz … Hopefully

20 Mar

Apparently, today is World Sleep Day, and since I have nothing but love for sleep, I thought I’d mention it here.

I am excited and prepared to celebrate the holiday by going to bed at a decent hour tonight so I can get more hours of shut-eye than I have been getting the past few days. (Whose fault is that? My own.)

According to the official site for the holiday, the theme for this year’s World Sleep Day is “transportation,” and I look forward to being transported to a dream world where everything is wonderful and peaceful and fun, so I can wake up in the morning fully rested and ready to enjoy the weekend.

Zzzzzzzzzz…

Happy Time

19 Mar

A funny thing happens when you’re happy … You have less to blog about, and less incentive to blog because you’d rather be living your life offline.

At least that’s how it has been for me lately.

And I know my “life is good” attitude runs counter to the general mood of the public (it certainly runs counter to that of many people I know), so I’ve also made a conscious attempt not to make too big a deal about it for fear I’d appear to be rubbing it in.

But I am happy these days, more so than I’ve been in a very long time.

And I just wanted to say that because, well, I don’t see why I shouldn’t.

Whatever

19 Jan

Absurd Associate Press headline of the day:
Tom Cruise ‘always wanted to kill Hitler’

Spinning the Wheel

6 Jan

MacWorld is this week, and the Onion has news about the biggest product announcement of the day, a laptop with no keyboard!

Behold … the MacBook Wheel.

As Steve Jobs says, people who use keyboards are “standing in the way of human progress.”

http://www.theonion.com/video_embed/?id=14299
Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard

A Stand Up Idea

14 Dec

Just a quick shout-out and thanks to whoever first thought to hang newspapers above the urinals in men’s bathrooms.

What a brilliant idea this was.

I was reminded of this Saturday night when I went to Border Cafe and had to go.

Men never know where to look when they’re in the restroom, and on this particular occasion, I had the front page of the Boston Globe Sports section to stare at and read.

Newspapers hanging at urinals is nothing new, but they’re always — always— appreciated.

So yeah, thanks.

Cure Pantlessteria!

20 Nov

Dear readers — and specifically, dear male readers — today I bring you the belated news that we are right in the middle of Pants Awareness Month.

This important month is brought to you by a San Francisco–based company called Cordarounds.com, which — yes — sells pants.

But not just pants. All kinds of pants: corduroy pants, seersucker pants, bike to work pants, smoking jackets, and much more.

So shocker of shockers, they have a real investment in this campaign.

In a press release sent out to announce the month, they say “Every autumn, millions of American men tragically go pantless while their fellow citizens turn a blind eye. This is the terrible affliction known as ‘Pantlessteria’ — more commonly referred to as ‘Sansapant Syndrome,’ ‘Trousernot,’ or ‘Nay Slacks disease.'” Continue reading

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