Arrrrrrrrrrgh

Oh, bugger.

That’s my reaction when it comes to Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest. I was really disappointed and frustrated by this movie.

The first Pirates was so much fun, so exciting, so fresh. This one drags, is too long, and doesn’t have the same spark.

Largely, that’s a result of editing. Specifically, there was none.

The movie takes about 20 minutes to actually begin, and though Johnny Depp has a funny entrance, it’s sort of worthless because he has another one — the way he should have been introduced, the way the movie should have started — some time later.

Basically, this Pirates just needed to be a whole lot tighter. Instead it’s as loose and swishy as Jack Sparrow himself.

And despite the three-way mill wheel sword fight toward the end and the effect of Davy Jones’ face (he’s changed quite a bit from when he was in the Monkees), it’s just not as memorable as the first film.

Anyway, I don’t want to write a long wet blanket review, so I’ll keep this short.

But the comparison I kept making after the movie was to Back to the Future 2 (though I guess The Matrix Reloaded also would have sufficed). Like that sequel, this one is simply the middle chapter, with one of the main characters’ fate in jeopardy at the end. (Yes, that’s right: there’s a cliffhanger ending.) I would much rather this had been a self-contained Jack Sparrow adventure.

Considering the movie is already about a half hour too long and I didn’t enjoy it all that much, the last thing I want is to continue the same story a year from now. Arrrrrgh.

Pirates gets a C-.