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No One

1 Jul

Sometime in June 2005, I was asked at the Virgin Megastore on Newbury Street (before it was a lame Best Buy) if I wanted to buy a $1 wristband to support One, the organization founded by Bono to combat world hunger, poverty, and other global issues.

I’m on record as saying I don’t support hunger, so I said yes, and almost instantly, I put the wristband on my wrist.

Over the years, people would ask me what the white wristband meant, and I would often use the same line: it’s my way of identifying myself as a single person. That, or I’d say a census taker came by, saw I was single, and told me to wear the wristband.

I enjoyed extending the story to explain that if I ever saw someone on the street wearing one of these wristbands, I’d know she was available and a potential mate.

I guess it’s safe to say that I supported the cause of ending my single status more than that of ending world hunger. And to that end, I always wore the wristband.

Always.

Annoyingly and unattractively so, it never came off. (Except for my sister’s wedding, when she asked me to remove it. Hey, you don’t mess with a bride.)

Well, this past weekend I finally took the wristband off.

For good.

No, it’s not because I’ve started dating someone. And amazingly enough, its not because I realized the wristband was probably counter-productive to getting women to go out with me (though I suppose there may be something to that).

It’s just that, um, er, well, ah, I finally decided that the wristband’s kinda lame.

And I think everyone agrees because I never see anyone wearing any kind of wristband. Not white ones, not red ones — not even the yellow ones that were so ubiquitous a year or two ago.

In fact, I don’t think I ever saw another person wearing a white wristband in the entire three-year period I had one on.

But passing fad aside, what happened?

Those yellow Livestrong bracelets were everywhere. Now they’re nowhere.

I’ll admit, my wristband came off partly because it was just not cool anymore to wear it. But that’s me and I’m lame like that.

Where are all the other people who are less impressionable than me? What happened to their bracelets?

It’s the Circle of Life

30 Oct

I suppose it’s nature’s way that as one couple marries, another one should separate.

Poor Reese and Ryan.

Making Plans

17 Oct

Since it seems that Lindsay Lohan and I both seem to have the same life plan — we both want to be married by the time we’re 30 — I would like to publicly offer to marry Ms. Lohan and make an honest woman out of her.

LiLo, will you marry me? I’m not doing anything on Saturday. Can you meet me here in Boston? Consider this also your invitation, my lucky readers.

(Hopefully Lindsay won’t notice that I’m actually 32 and clearly missed my “deadline.” It’s alright, though. Some things are better late than never.)

Dating Sucks

22 Aug

I know many of you enjoyed my recent post about the fake web site supposedly created by a woman whose husband had cheated on her. Well, here’s another good read.

Apparently — and this one is real, folks — some guy in New York named Darren met a woman named Joanne on JDate back in June. (If you don’t know, JDate is a dating site for members of the tribe.) They went out, she led him on, said she’d go out with him again, so he paid for the entire date. Well, guess what? She had no interest in going out with this guy again. So what did he do? He emailed and called and tried to get her to pay for her half of the date ($50). When she didn’t respond, he kept calling and emailing. And when she did email, it only encouraged him to call and email more.

Suffice it to say, you can read all the emails and hear — yes, hear — all the voice mails right here.

According to Snopes.com, which reports on web hoaxes, this isn’t the first time such a thing has happened or been passed around the internet. But this Darren guy is apparently very real, as the blog GonzoRangers has discovered. I won’t link to his company’s web site or to news stories that quote him, but you can find them very easily if you want to. And for further proof, check out this story from the New York Daily News. Or, you can check out Confessions of a Drama Duchess not only to read excerpts from Darren’s JDate profile, but also to see his picture. Continue reading →

At Least I Got an Umbrella

11 Jun

umbrellaI’m happy to report that my 10-year reunion has come and passed.

And while I only went to the barbecue on Saturday afternoon (which was moved indoors because of the weather), that was clearly enough. Continue reading →

When Am I Going to Get Mine?

26 Feb

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy buying gifts.

I think it’s a fun creative exercise of sorts, and a test of how well I know someone or what they’d like.

And I think I’m good at it — usually — or at least I’m told I give great gifts.

For example, I was supposed to go fishing a couple weeks ago with a friend of mine for his birthday. The trip didn’t work out, so I bought him fish of a different variety, the Swedish kind.

And I also have no problem buying a bottle of wine or something when I go over to someone’s new house or apartment, or spending extra if I find a gift I particularly like, even if I know it won’t be reciprocated.

Similarly, and please don’t get me wrong on this point especially, I am happy for all my friends’ marriages, births, and other special occasions. Continue reading →

I’m Guilty

6 Feb

Confession of the day: I think I love Lisa Loeb‘s new show on E!, #1 Single.

Sure, any show that professes to honestly portray what it’s like to be single and dating is a bit skewed, especially if the subject is a celebrity (C-list or otherwise). But the second episode, which aired this weekend (or rather, which I saw for the first time this weekend), was pretty funny, and not in the same kind of demeaning way that many reality shows about dating are. Continue reading →

One Degree of Martin

7 Sep

I suppose it’s cool knowing that I went to school with actors who have made it big.

I may not have been friends with all of these guys, but still, who doesn’t enjoy saying “I know him?”

These days, I can do that with a solid handful of folks. Continue reading →

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