All the New Movies I’ve Seen: Second-Quarter 2023 Edition

Summer’s here, and the time is right for … watching movies.

If you like big blockbusters, there’s going to be plenty for you to see between now and Labor Day, including the latest (and final?) Indiana Jones adventure, the new Mission: Impossible flick, the July 21 double-feature of Barbie and Oppenheimer, and yes, Meg 2.

But before we get into all that, I wanted to recap the 20 new movies I’ve seen since my last movie-review roundup. For the record, I saw 16 of them in a theater and four via streaming. Also, I saw one movie twice, but only counted it once here. Regardless, my total for the year so far is 36.

I’ve shared my thoughts about most of what I’ve seen on Twitter and/or Instagram (Stories), and I’ve written some longer-form reviews of some of them here, but I haven’t documented my thoughts about everything. So, here in one place is a quick look at all the movies I’ve seen over the last three months, in the (reverse-chronological) order in which I saw them.

36. No Hard Feelings. With its plot about an “older” woman (Jennifer Lawrence) hired by the parents of an awkward teen (Andrew Barth Feldman) to take his virginity before he goes to college, this movie wants to be a raunchy comedy along the lines of so many we’ve seen before (including director Gene Stupnitsky’s own Good Boys, a much better and funnier film). Alas, it’s more sweet than sexy. Not a bad thing, per se, but the result is less funny and less outrageous — and thus, less fun — than it could have been. Grade: B–

35. A Beautiful Life. Conventional, cliched, and not very good Danish movie about a talented singer plucked from obscurity and his rapid, completely unbelievable rise to fame. Some of the songs by Christopher are quite good, though. Especially “I Hope This Song Is for You.” Grade: C

34. Elemental. Cute, attractively animated, but heavy-handed film that’s the latest subpar and generally disappointing Pixar release. (Oh, how the mighty have fallen.) There are so many puns in this movie that I was fully expecting to hear an Earth, Wind & Fire song on the soundtrack. Oh well. Grade: B–

33. How to Blow Up a Pipeline. A tense thriller about a group of no-fucks-left-to-give Gen Z’ers attempting to, yes, blow up an oil pipeline in Texas. The first three-quarters of the film are tight and fast-paced. But the operation runs out of, um, gas towards the end. Grade: B

32. The Flash. Read my review here. Grade: B

31. A Thousand and One. I’m so sorry I missed this one when it was in theaters, because A Thousand and One absolutely knocked me out when I finally watched it via Peacock. The movie is a devastating portrait of how a segment of the population got caught in the middle of gentrification in the late 1990s/early 2000s, and how, in the middle of all that, a mother does what she has to do to hold on to her son. It features powerful performances by Teyana Taylor and Josiah Cross, and a beautiful score by Gary Gunn. And that ending is a real gut punch. What a debut by A.V. Rockwell. One of the best films of the year. Grade: A

30. Sanctuary. Not great. This one would have been better as a stage play, if anything. It felt like the actors were just reading a script the whole time, and not a good one. To that end, the conflict got tiresome and the resolution didn’t feel earned at all. Grade: C–

29. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse. Visually inventive and action packed, this worthy sequel is a blast and an awfully good time. The cliffhanger ending left me wanting more. Grade: B+

28. Asteroid City. Read my review here. Grade: B

27. Blackberry. A great telling of the story behind the Blackberry, and how Research in Motion created a market segment, only to be crushed by Apple’s iPhone. Impressive performances from Jay Baruchel and Glenn Howerton. Grade: B+

26. Joy Ride. Unfunny. Pandering. Maybe I wasn’t the target audience for this one, but it was disappointing nevertheless. Grade: C

25. Fast X. Ridiculous as always, but still generally fun. The chase through the streets of Rome is fantastic, and Jason Momoa is a great baddie. Maybe a top-5 F&F film. Didn’t like the abrupt ending, though. Parts 5 and 6 remain the top films in the series. Grade: B

24. You Hurt My Feelings. Read my review here. Grade: B 

23. Past Lives (x2). Read my review here. Grade: A

22. Still: A Michael J. Fox Movie. Read my review here. Grade: A

21. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3. Read my review here. Grade: B

20. Ghosted. A lame, corny, generic action/comedy. Some fun cameos, but they’re unnecessary and random. The whole time, I couldn’t help but wonder: Why is Chris Evans acting so helpless? Doesn’t he know he’s Captain America? Grade: C

19. Somewhere in Queens. Ray Romano’s directorial debut is a fine family dramedy. A little sitcommy at times, but it feels lived in and knowingly authentic at times, too. Not a bad movie. Just fine. Grade: B–

18. Beau Is Afraid. Ari Aster’s latest makes Midsommar look sane and normal. An overly long, overindulgent trip to crazytown. Patti LuPone is great, though. Grade: C

17. Renfield. Read my review here. Grade: B+

I don’t know about you, but after all that I’ve seen so far this year, I’m looking forward to seeing what the second half of the year has in store, movie-wise.