Two Years

At what point do you remove someone from your cell phone?

I asked myself that question again this morning as I thought about my Bubby.

Today is the two-year anniversary of her death, and I still find myself wanting to call her every now and then as if she’s still with us and might actually answer the phone. Of course, I know that’s not true (heck, I know there’s not even an answering machine hooked up to her phone anymore), but it’s just what happens when I scroll through my cell phone and see her there. I’m in no rush to “erase” her, or delete her name from my numbers, so I think I’ll keep Bubby on my phone for a while more.

I think what it comes down to is something like what Coldplay sings in their song “42”: “Those who are dead are not dead, they’re just living in my head.”

Bubby’s not really gone if I keep her on my mind, as she is today, more so than on other days.

I still really miss her.