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I Don’t Eat Big Ones

16 Oct

If Super Size Me didn’t turn you off to eating fast food, well, then Fast Food Nation certainly will. In fact, it may just turn you off to eating meat altogether. The lastest film from Richard Linklater, one of my favorite directors (he directed Dazed and Confused, Before Sunrise, and Before Sunset, among other films), Fast Food Nation is based on the book by Eric Schlosser. Only instead of the film being a documentary, it’s a dramatic version of what Schlosser documents. We meet (no pun intended) Mexicans who come across the border and work in the meat processing plant, a marketing executive looking into charges that the meat in the hamburgers includes fecal matter, the teenagers who work in a fast food joint, and various other folks who work in and around the fast food industry. While there’s not so much of a plot, there is a lot of character, and we see just who these people are who are making, marketing, and selling us our Big Macs and Whoppers.

Suffice it to say, Fast Food Nation does not paint a pretty picture of the industry. Teens spit into burgers, they drop them on the floor but cook them anyway, the processing plant employees don’t always keep things as clean as possible … you get the idea. There are a lot of lofty statements about things like how disobeying the Patriot Act is the most patriotic thing you can do, and a lot of strong accusations about meat makers and those who eat fast food. And Linklater doesn’t exactly bash your head making these points. Instead he takes his typically slow and thoughful approach — though what he’s saying isn’t exactly subtle either. I mean, the most effective scenes may be those that show the abusive ways cows are killed and slaughtered (it’s inhumane, bloody, and gross, and Linklater shows it all to us). Acting is generally good across the board — the cast includes Greg Kinnear, Bobby Cannavale, Kris Kristofferson, Ethan Hawke, Avril Lavigne, and Bruce Willis — and the film is quite effective at making its points. I wouldn’t call this one of my favorite movies of the year, but it’s good and worth seeing (when it opens on November 17), and I’ll give it a B.

Incidentally, Linklater was at the screening I went to and he hung around afterwards to do a Q&A. It was, unfortunately, dominated by some politically-minded vegetarians and a B.U. film professor who sort of took the fun out of chatting up this great filmmaker, but I did learn that the processing plant scenes were shot in Mexico and that Linklater (though he grew up and still lives in Texas) has been a vegetarian since 1983, and that half the funding for the movie came from overseas because it’s predicted the film will do better there than here, and that Schlosser sought Linklater out to adapt the book, not vice versa. Personally, I would rather have also learned more about Linklater’s progression from the smaller films to bigger ones like this one, and if he’s going to continue to make more films that tackle hot button issues, but those questions will have to be asked by the reporters who’ll be interviewing him for stories soon to appear in magazines and newspapers closer to the film’s release.

This Is an Awful, Awful Movie … Not!

10 Oct

If Borat is so wrong, then why does it feel so right?

Alright, maybe that’s not exactly what I want to say about the movie (its actual name is Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan, but damn, this is simultaneously one of the funniest and one of the most offensive movies I have ever seen.

If you don’t know, Borat is a character played by the British comic Sacha Baron Cohen who is supposed to be a television reporter from Kazakhstan.

Basically, the movie is a mockumentary of Borat’s exploits as he travels across the U.S., first in pursuit of knowledge about America and then in pursuit of Pamela Anderson (really).

And Borat is naive, totally clueless, and without social graces, so this makes for some great comedy. Continue reading

So Funny It’s Painful

8 Oct

Movies don’t get much funnier, grosser, painful, oh, and did I mention funnier than Jackass: Number Two. In fact, I think the only movie that may be funnier than this one may actually be the original Jackass movie.

There are skits here that had me tearing up I was laughing so hard, especially a pretty harmless one involving Chris Pontius dressed as the devil. Others I could barely watch they were so gross.

And another skit is so un-P.C. that the fact that one guy is wearing a beard made of, uh, hair from between the guys’ legs is the least offensive part.

Continue reading

The Arrived

7 Oct

Damn. The Departed is one very good movie.

Start to near-finish, I was on the edge of my seat watching one of the best ensemble acting jobs of the year spinning a story of cops and the mob, a story of conflicting loyalties, and a story of Boston’s underbelly.

I swear, with the exception of Mark Wahlberg, who is just a little too over the top, this is top-notch acting all around. Even DiCaprio, who I don’t generally like, is excellent. It’s like the guy grew up ten years between The Aviator and this movie, and his face shows it. (Leo actually looks like he could be the brother of Eric Dane, who plays “Dr. McSteamy” on Grey’s Anatomy.) Continue reading

Watch the Oats

4 Oct

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the early front-runner for this year’s Best Picture: Employee of the Month. Alright, I’m obviously kidding, but believe me when I say that this movie is better and funnier than it has any right to be. And most of the credit for that goes to Dane Cook, whose cool charm carries this comedy from start to finish. Jessica Simpson again shows off her talents, but ahem, not as well as she did in Dukes of Hazzard. And that’s probably all you really want to know about this film, right? It gets a B from me, for better than expected.

One Thing Does Not Make a Man

16 Sep

Chances are good you’ve never heard of Half Nelson, but it’s the kind of small, independent movie you should seek out as the weather turns cooler and the “better” movies come out.

It’s a film about a guy named Dan (Ryan Gosling, who you might know from The Notebook), who teaches eighth grade in New York City and also has an awful addiction to cocaine. In the classroom, he’s largely in control and the students seem to actually respect him. Out of class, however, he’s a mess. Continue reading

You Can Thank Me Later

13 Sep

Sometimes I feel like I see movies so you don’t have to. That’s not to say that School for Scoundrels is soooo bad. But considering it’s directed and co-written by the guy who did Old School and features a cast including Billy Bob Thornton, Sarah Silverman, David Cross, and Jon Heder, it’s a bit of a disappointment that it’s not terribly good. Heder plays Roger, a timid traffic cop who enrolls in a confidence class taught by Dr. P (Thornton). Roger’s attitude changes so much that Dr. P engages Roger in a game of one-upmanship to see who can win the affection of Amanda (Jacinda Barrett — yes, her again), a woman who lives in Roger’s building who he has a crush on. Anyway, the film has a couple good laughs and it’s nice to see Heder playing a person, not a character, but other than that, ehhhhh. School for Scoundrels gets a C. It’s out on September 29. Don’t bother.

Kissing Summer Roberts

12 Sep

Michael, the character Zach Braff plays in The Last Kiss, has a pretty sweet life, and he knows it.

He’s got a good job, great friends, and a beautiful girlfriend named Jenna (Jacinda Barrett) who loves him and who is carrying their child.

But Jenna wants to get married and buy a house, so Michael is getting antsy and nervous about the way his life is not just inching but sprinting toward more responsibility. Wasn’t it just yesterday that he was a twentysomething and didn’t have a care in the world? Now Michael is about to turn 30 and adulthood responsibilities await. Continue reading

Weekend Winners and Losers

27 Aug

Winner: The Office, for winning the Emmy for Best Comedy Series, and My Name Is Earl, for winning awards for writing and directing
Loser: The rest of the show. Aside from Conan’s opening, it was a snooze.

Loser: Ari Gold
Winner: Jeremy Piven

Loser: The Red Sox. Still. They should just stop playing. I mean actually stop playing. It was painful last weekend, but now it’s just an agonizingly slow crawl to October.
Winner: Me, because I didn’t watch any of it

Winner: Saturday’s weather
Loser: Sunday’s weather

Winner: My eyes. I had an opthamologist appointment on Saturday and got some new glasses.
Loser: Rims. My new glasses have none.

Loser: Snakes on a Plane. Why isn’t anyone seeing this movie??
Winner: Everyone who did see Snakes on a Plane. I still say I’d pay to see it again.

Winner: The weekend. It was relaxing and good.
Loser: The weekend. Too short, as always.

Snakes in a Movie Theater!

23 Aug

Best news story I heard today:
Rattlers Freed in Snakes on a Plane Theater Prank

PHOENIX (Reuters) — Life imitating art is all very well. Unless, that is, it’s a movie about deadly snakes on the rampage.
Movie chain AMC Entertainment Inc. said pranksters at one of its Phoenix theaters released two live diamondback rattlesnakes during a showing of the film Snakes on a Plane last Friday. No one was injured…. (read the rest here)

A local video report on the story is here.

This is perhaps the only thing that could have made the movie more enjoyable for me. I love this story!