A Couple of Bloody Good Movies

Two of the most underrated films of the last 10 years were The Man from U.N.C.L.E. and Ready or Not. Both were released late in the summer and were pleasant surprises that successfully blended humor with classic genre appeal (action and horror, respectively). The latter even made my list of my favorite films of 2019 (it ranked #6).

Coincidentally, both films’ creators are back with new releases this week. While their new movies aren’t as good as these other works, they are still worth checking out.

Here are my reviews.

Try to Have Fun

In Guy Ritchie’s The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, the Man of Steel himself, Henry Cavill (one of U.N.C.L.E.’s two stars), leads a team of rogues on a mission to sabotage Nazi Germany’s submarine capabilities. If you’re thinking this must be Ritchie’s version of Inglorious Basterds, you’re basically right. Throw in elements of The Dirty Dozen and you’ve got the idea.

The film is loosely based on a real mission that was carried out by the Special Operations Executive, a covert military unit created by Winston Churchill (played here by Rory Kinnear) in the early days of World War II. Rakish, charming, and off-kilter Major Gus March-Phillipps (that would be Cavill, whose early scenes in Argylle are the only reason to see that awful film) is assigned to round up a team that will sabotage a Nazi supply depot and then get to work on the subs. If they’re successful, the British hope the U.S. will be more willing to get into the war because, at the time, the Americans’ ships were unable to pass through an impenetrable line of Nazi U-boats.

As might be expected from the title and its pedigree, Ungentlemanly Warfare features a largely irreverent tone, some gleeful violence, and witty banter (co-written by Ritchie, Paul Tamasy, Eric Johnson, and Arash Amel), that’s delivered by a charismatic cast including Alan Ritchson (Fast X), Alex Pettyfer (Magic Mike), and Henry Golding (Last Christmas). Eiza Gonzales (Baby Driver) also impresses as a glamorous Jewish actress and double agent with a personal agenda of her own.

To paraphrase Churchill, the film features a lot of “blood, murder, and mayhem” — though I could have used even more of the mayhem. Still, Ungentlemanly Warfare is what you might call good “Dad fun.” It’s also not typical of Ritchie’s better-known films (e.g., Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels), and that may be why I mostly liked it.

I’m giving it a B.

By the way, if Ritchie wants to make a Man from U.N.C.L.E. sequel, he could easily replace Armie Hammer with Ritchson. I’d watch the hell out of that movie. (Just as long as Alicia Vikander comes back, too.)

I’m Sorry About What’s Going to Happen to You

A group of baddies get much more than they bargained for when they kidnap a sweet little girl and she turns out to be a bit of a monster. Literally. That’s the simple premise of Abigail, a high-concept film that makes you wait for it, and then delivers all the blood you could ever want to see in a single film.

Controversial actress Melissa Barrera (In the Heights) is just one of the would-be criminals assembled for what appears to be an easy but very lucrative job: Kidnapping a wealthy guy’s kid and then spending 24 hours in an out-of-the-way safe house until the ransom is paid to get her back. Others in the crew include Dan Stevens, Kathryn Newton, Kevin Durand, and the late Angus Cloud, whose character’s death (sorry) can’t come too soon.

Guy Busick, one of Ready or Not’s writers, co-wrote Abigail’s screenplay with Stephen Shields. They and the directing team of Tyler Gillett and Matt Bettinelli-Olpin (better known as Radio Silence) delay what we all want to see, which is Abigail baring her teeth and making these unsuspecting kidnappers experience the error of their ways. If she doesn’t kill you, then the anticipation will. And then, when hell breaks loose, it’s worth the wait. The film may not be as funny as Ready or Not, but what it lacks in deadpan humor and twisted kills, it makes up for in bloody messes, and those made me laugh pretty hard.

In addition to Ready, Radio Silence also made the last two Scream movies. If nothing else, Abigail proves that Gillett and Bettinelli-Olpin should stick to original films like this one where they can pull their own strings, and not wade into franchise waters where they’re beholden to an established formula.

To be blunt, Abigail isn’t as good as Ready or Not — it’s definitely not as memorable. But when the good stuff started happening, it was close enough to what I wanted it to be that I still enjoyed it.

I’m giving it a solid B. Yes, that’s a B for bloody.